


Why Not Both?

by pherryt



Series: The Pros and Cons of a Triumvirate [4]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek AOS, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Angst, F/F, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, New perspectives, Transporter Malfunction, Two universes collide, brief uhura/chapel, consider this part 1 for the pros and cons of the triumvirate series, meddling!jim, open secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-27
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2019-12-25 09:56:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18258950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pherryt/pseuds/pherryt
Summary: A transporter malfunction leaves Kirk on an entirely different Enterprise, staring at two different Spocks while in another universe Dr. McCoy is faced with incontrovertible proof that hecouldhave had something special withhisJim, if only things had worked out differently.





	1. And Never the Twain… Shall… Meet…? Whoops…

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Unforth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unforth/gifts).



> This is basically the AOS Crew meets OS Crew, which can become confusing so, before reading:
> 
> for simplicity sake to cut down on confusion, I've had to assign one crew to work with last names only through narration (dialogue would not be affected because there'd be no reason for them to change their habits) to lessen the confusion. So, AOS crew are first names while the OS crew (until the last chapter when it's just them) are all last names.
> 
> To also ease confusion - each chapter is a different POV and will be labeled as to which one at the start of each chapter
> 
> it's completely written and i shall post it serially a couple times a week which means it should be finished posting by the end of next week.
> 
> Who to blame for this fic?  
> Unforth and i were talking about Spirk vs Mckirk a few years ago. this was meant to be a quick one shot with some hilarious shenanigans. i got about 5000 words in and stalled.  
> Thayer accidentally reinvigorated the story every time he chose a Mcspirk prompt off my star trek bingo and i suddenly - after not touching it for about 2 years - knew what i had to do.
> 
> i had two beta's - prairiedawn and lukesaysno - thank you both for reading through it!! this is the longest star trek story I've ever written and i'm glad i'm finally putting this out there! i really appreciate the help ;D  
> also practically the whole of the weekend writing marathon discord in helping me figure out what to name the radiation etc...

**POV – OS Kirk**

The whine of the transporter faded away and Kirk, Spock and Ensign Heinz immediately moved to step down. Kirk froze as his eyes darted around, taking in the unfamiliar room filled with a different sort of tech than his intended destination  _ should _ have been filled with. It was sleeker, for one, not as cramped, for another.

At his side, Spock and their security detail of exactly one did the same, Spock perhaps a split second sooner.

"Captain, this is not the Enterprise." The monotone voice, pitched low, didn't carry past the transporter pads and his companions, which Kirk appreciated.

"I can see that, Spock." Kirk answered in a voice just as low. Heinz rested his hand on his hip and the weapon strapped there, seen easily against his red shirt.

Across the room, larger than most of the transporter rooms they were used to, was a really young, blonde, curly haired fellow in a similar style and color shirt as Kirk’s, just made out of a somewhat different material, it seemed.

The boy _ , he really was young _ , Kirk thought, had started to speak as the three of them had begun stepping down, but when he looked up from his console, his face dropped.

"Velcome back Kept- Bozhe moi! You are not the Keptin!" He lunged forward before the trio could decide what to do, and slapped at a button on the console. Immediately, they were deafened by the hideous klaxon sound that erupted around them, lights flashing and blinding as the boys’ voice echoed through the room and, presumably, the rest of the ship.

"Intruder alert, intruder alert in transporter room 2! Intruder alert!" He let go of the console before him, but the noise and lights continued unabated. He reached for a weapon and quickly pointed it at them. "Do not move!"

Kirk slowly raised his hands as non-threateningly as he could and tried to turn on a charming, innocent smile. Behind him, Spock and Heinz followed suit with their own hands but otherwise left the situation all to their Captain.

"I'm Captain James T. Kirk of the starship Enterprise, I think there's been some mistake. There's no need for violence, we come in peace."

"Impossible! You do not look like the Keptin!"

"Excuse me?" Kirk and Spock traded confused looks, Heinz looking on nervously. "I'm afraid I don't understand. Why don't we all exchange names here, all right? I promise – " he waggled his hands in the air " – no tricks! We'll behave."

"I am Ensign Pavel  Andreievich  Chekov."

Kirk felt a chill go down his spine at the words and he leaned slightly towards Spock to murmur softly, knowing the Vulcan’s sharp ears would easily pick up the sound.

"Either someone's done a very bad job at trying to copy our ship and crew for some unfathomable reason or…"

"Or we have somehow traversed dimensions once again and the differences in this one are fairly significant on some levels. I must admit, the second seems more likely based on our previous experiences."

Kirk gave a slight nod of agreement as they all kept their attention on the boy currently holding a weapon on them.

The four of them stood there, stalemated. The security man, Heinz, who stood behind Kirk and Spock was fidgeting and Kirk worried he might do something foolish. He had a poor track record with experienced security personnel. He was starting to suspect that Starfleet was just tossing these kids out into the black with a phaser and prayer and not much else.

Before the anxious, curly haired ensign before them could demand further names, however, the door slid open and four new men lunged inside.

In mere seconds, the one in front – a near identical copy of the one beside Kirk - assessed the situation and skidded to a stop, holding his arms out from his sides to prevent the other three from moving forward. Spocks double was slightly younger, perhaps, but was dressed similarly in blue and had the same, piercing and calculating gaze when presented with a fascinating situation and Kirk had a weird sense of double vision.

"Hold." The other Spock’s strong, even voice rang out as he stared at the trio before him. Without taking his eyes off them, he addressed the boy who’d called himself Chekov. "At ease Ensign, and you may call off the alert as well."

He turned back to the security that had followed him into the room. "You may return to your stations. I can handle everything from here."

Finally, he turned back to Kirk, Spock and Heinz who were taking the lessening of hostilities as their cue to lower their arms.

"Gentleman." The other Spock inclined his head respectfully, "I believe we have much to discuss. If you will follow me."

He didn't make it much of a question, but rather a statement. With a shrug, Kirk grinned and hopped the rest of the way down off the pad, his companions following closely, though perhaps more warily, behind him.

"Yes, a…discussion may just be in order. I don't think we're where we were supposed to be."

"I can confirm that you are not."

"Do you know who we are?"

"I know that you are Captain Kirk and that is Ambassador Spock."

"Commander!" Chekov’s eyes widened with his exclamation as he looked between the Spocks, realizing, finally, that they  _ did _ look somewhat alike.

"Ambassador?” Kirk grinned at his Spock and had to refrain from elbowing him as he teased. “You hiding something from me, Spock?"

"I am unaware of anything that I could possibly be hiding. I am not currently, nor have I ever been an ambassador,” Spock said somewhat stiffly, but there was fond exasperation floating over the bond at Kirk’s teasing.

"Perhaps I misspoke. You  _ shall _ be in your future, which would be wise not to divulge what little I know of that. But please, let us go somewhere more appropriate for this discussion."

He turned and walked through the door, Kirk, Spock and Heinz following him as they left a poor confused Ensign Chekov behind. As they stepped down the hall, Kirk leaned over to whisper at Spock.

"Good lord, there's two of you. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"That is hardly appropriate at this time, Jim."

"Mmm…. maybe not, but come  _ on _ ! Tell me you wouldn't be thinking the same thing if there were two of  _ me?" _  The Spock in front of them paused and turned his head somewhat to eye them with a raised brow.  It was only their own fast reflexes that prevent them from running into him at his sudden stop.

"Am I correct in assuming that you are implying that the relationship between yourselves is that of a lover's nature?" Other Spock asked.

"Yeah. Why, is that different here?" Kirk asked back, curious. Was he alone here, in this reality? Had he and Spock just not yet made the leap? Or did he have someone else… an idle thought flickered across his mind of who that someone else could be – if he didn’t have Spock.

"Very." Without elaboration, Other Spock faced forward again and resumed his quick pace, eventually bringing them to a private conference room. He was probably preoccupied with wondering what had become of  _ his _ Captain and whoever had been on the away party with him.  

Seating themselves around the table, Other Spock offered refreshments to the room, but after being declined, Other Spock got straight to business.

"I am, as you may have deduced, Commander Spock. I am currently in charge until such time as the Captain and Dr. McCoy return with the rest of the away team from a survey of the planet below.  The Stardate is 2260.30 and we have recently embarked on our five-year mission."

"Really?" Kirk was thoughtful. "We're almost done with ours, sounds like we had a bit of a late start, since our Stardate is almost ten years later, 2269.97

"That would explain the apparent age difference." Other Spock said. Kirk’s Spock agreed with him simply, with one lonely word,

"Indeed."

Inclining his head to acknowledge Spock, Other Spock continued. "I am interested to know what other differences there are in our respective timelines but I fear we have more pressing matters."

"Yes, of course,” Kirk said, slouching slightly to the side in his chair and rubbing lightly at his chin. “We need to figure out how this happened, and where your captain and the rest have gone, and how we can return to our own reality. Hopefully your folks aren't in any trouble and are simply aboard our ship, though I do fear that the transition won't happen as smoothly over there as it has here. We’ve had some… incidents in the past. Though, it is very obvious that you've had some experience meeting your other self, so you may have as well."

"I have. And, in fact…" Other Spock leaned forward to touch a button on the table and the ships intercom flared alive. "Nyota, would you be so kind as to contact Ambassador Spock at your earliest convenience?"

"Of course. One moment," came the crisp reply as Other Spock relaxed back into his seat. The implications of Other Spocks words were… well. Not just two, but  _ three  _ Spock existing at the same time? Jim was afraid his mind would explode if they were all three in the same room.

"You are in a relationship with the lieutenant?" Spock said evenly to Other Spock.

Kirk nearly fell out of his chair at the abruptness of the statement. Looking back and forth between the two of them in astonishment, he thought back to the last few words spoken. What had he missed?

"We are."

The two of them stared at each other in the silence and Kirk suddenly felt a twinge of jealousy hit him. He tried to fight it down. After all, it wasn't even  _ his _ Spock that was with the lovely communications officer.

Then again, he and Spock hadn’t even been together for all that long and despite his confident demeanor, Kirk wasn’t always so sure of himself. What did Spock even see in him anyway?

Then another niggling little thought bubbled up, bugging and worrying at him with a somewhat nauseous feeling.

If Other Spock was with someone else, then did that mean  _ he _ was alone? A sinking feeling hit his stomach and he looked over at Other Spock with worry and question in his eyes. Despite not being  _ his  _ Spock, it was apparently just as easy for this one to read him as it was for his own.

"If you must know, Captain Kirk, your counterpart is in a relationship with Dr. McCoy."

Kirk let out an explosive breath. "Bones?!"

His eyes wide, he turned to look at his own Spock, his T'hy'la, to see what his reaction was to this news. He looked very non-plussed, even for his usual stoic Vulcan self.

Kirk shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "You know I've never-"

"Jim, if you are worried that I am jealous of the good Doctor, I can assure you that I am not. While you and Doctor McCoy have always held a special bond, I have never worried that it would interfere with our relationship. While they are us, in a sense, they are also  _ not  _ us, and the decisions and life experiences they have had are not our own,” Spock said reasonably.

Far from reassuring him, Kirks stomach became even further unsettled. There seemed something off about Spocks’ words but he couldn’t put his finger on it, and nothing he was gleaning from their mental bond was helping.

“I guarantee that I am not concerned, Jim,” Spock said softly. “Just as I hope you are not jealous of Lieutenant Uhura."

"No! Of course not! I know you'd never…" Kirk trailed off, unsure how to finish the statement.

It was moments like these that Kirk wished they were alone. For those rare moments of intimacy that Spock would allow. Spock was, as of yet - even after all this time - uncomfortable with public displays and Kirk respected that.  It sometimes left him a little shaky when he found himself needing those moments and unable to take them, but between Spock and McCoy, he always pulled through until he could be alone with Spock again.

* +*+*+*+*+*+*+*

And in a different universe, at the same time, in a much smaller and stuffier transporter room on another Starship Enterprise, a second Captain Kirk, accompanied by Doctor McCoy and their entourage – a grand total of one lone redshirt named Hendorff - were stepping down off a transporter pad, just as completely baffled at the change in their expected destination as their counterparts.


	2. What was it this week?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim gets to watch two McCoys at work, comforted by the fact that Bones is Bones, no matter the universe.

****

AOS Jim POV

Jim stared back at the dark-haired Montgomery Scott currently glaring at him, Leonard and Hendorff in open mouthed astonishment even as Leonard wasted no time in grumbling and ranting about the transporter.

"I've told you over and over that these contraptions cause nothin' but trouble, but does anybody ever listen to me? Nooo! Instead, y'all think it's perfectly fine to go gallivantin' around the unknown galaxy in a bucket of bolts and completely willing to get your body ripped apart on the molecular level by this, this  _ thing -”  _ Leonard pointed viciously at the transporter pads. _ “-  _  and  _ hope _ nothin' goes wrong on the other end! Well, isn't  _ this _ a bit of a dandy situation we've got ourselves in now? You can rest assured it was the transporters fault! Mark my words!"

Jim wiped a hand down his face to smother the smile threatening to break out. Leonard was right, the situation was serious, but his usual breakdown about all things transporter was hard to ignore and brought a welcome blast of familiarity with it.

"Oy! Ye dinnae hear me callin' yer ship a bucket of bolts, now did ye?" Mr. Scott complained loudly.

"You haven't even seen our ship!” Leonard pointed out. “Right now,  _ we  _ aren't seein' our ship! Where the hell are we?"

"Ye're on the Federation Starship Enterprise –"

"Like hell we are!"

"Bones, calm down,” Jim said, taking hold of Leonard. Leonard grumbled but soothed under Jim’s hand.

"Och, this isn't making any sense. Don't ye move now, laddies."  Mr. Scott’s hands flew over the console, just as competent and skilled as the Scotty Jim was familiar with.

Swiftly making a call up to the bridge, Mr. Scott asked for the Senior Officer in charge – Mr. Sulu, as it turned out - and a Security detail. As he did so, he kept one eye on Jim, Leonard and Hendorff to make sure they didn't try anything.

While they waited, Jim and Leonard whispered back and forth to each other, Mr. Scott's confusion turning into one of mild amusement.

"He doesn’t exactly  _ look  _ like Mr. Scott, but he sure as hell acts like the man,” Leonard admitted.

"Agreed. What do you think is going on here, Bones?"

"You're asking me? I'm a Doctor, not your First Officer." Jim rolled his eyes at Leonard and gestured at the kit slung over his shoulder.

"Use your tricorder. We can probably use all the data we can get to figure out what's going on here. Though I think I already know."

"Care to share with the class?"

"Remember Nero?" Jim asked.

Leonard rolled his eyes right back at Jim as he pulled the tricorder off his shoulder and attempted to discretely use it to scan anything and everything nearby.

"That's not somethin' I'm likely to forget, darlin'."

"Right,” Jim acknowledged. “Well, when I was marooned on Delta Vega, I ran into that older version of Spock, the Ambassador, and we mind melded. He showed me the events leading up to Nero and himself getting stranded in our universe but I saw other things too."

Jim leaned in close, getting quieter. "I saw  _ this _ place, and his old crew at various points in their lives and I can tell you, without a single doubt, that that  _ is  _ Montgomery Scott."

"Fine. But that doesn’t answer the question of how in the blazes did we get here? Or how we’ll get home!" The alarmed look on Leonards’ face made Jim reach forward and grab his shoulder.

"Hey, don't worry about it, Bones. No matter which universe we're in, the Enterprise is the best damn crew you could get. We'll get back home by lunchtime, I promise. And I'll be with you every step of the way," Jim said with a reassuring pat to Leonards’ shoulder.

Judging by the look on Leonard’s face, he was judging the sincerity of the pat.

A door wooshed open and they turned to see a handful of redshirts flanking Mr. Sulu. Mr. Sulu and Mr. Scott exchanged nods and faced Jim, Leonard and the so far fairly silent Hendorff.

"All right, lads,” Mr. Scott said lightly, “I need to be stayin' down here meself, but if ye could just follow Mr. Sulu and these other fine gentlemen to the sickbay…"

This Enterprise was smaller than the one Jim was used to, and he stared about himself in fascination as they traversed the halls. It didn’t take half as long as usual to get to sickbay, though, and before he knew it, Jim and Leonard were entering sickbay with the man this reality called Sulu.

Leonard could be heard coming with all of his complaining about the ship, Jim was sure.

"For God's sake, I don't like this version of the Enterprise. It's cramped. I'm starting to feel claustrophobic and that’s not exactly doing me any favors right now, Jim."

"You'll be okay, Bones. I promise. When have I ever steered you wrong?" Jim asked. Leonard opened his mouth to speak and Jim rushed to cut him off with, "No, don't answer that."

The door to sickbay swished open and they discovered another man, in a blue short sleeved shirt instead of the normal uniform, with his back to the door. At the sound of it opening, though, he turned and his face filled with a long-suffering look.

He breathed out explosively before grumbling, "Oh for the love of  _ – again _ ?"

Acting Captain Sulu shrugged. "Just let me know who wins the pool, Doctor McCoy."

The doctor nodded as the gentlemen all watched the handsome Asian man leave Sickbay. There was silence while the doctor raised a brow at Kirk, Leonard and Hendorff.

Finally, in a grumpy drawl, he called out. "Well? Don't just stand in the doorway. Let's take a look at you." He barely waited before he growled. "Come on and get over here already so I can figure out what happened  _ this  _ time."

Shocked out of their surprise, they all stepped forward but it was Leonard who spoke first.

_ "This _ time?  _ Again _ ? This is a regular occurrence for you? Goddammit Jim, I told you those transporters would be the death of us –" Before he could repeat his rant - again - Jim clapped him on the shoulders and shoved him further into the room. Leonard staggered in surprise but caught himself. "Can it, Bones and let the good doctor do his thing. Or do you not trust yourself?"

"I'd say from the look of you, you're me from about ten years ago…only 3 inches taller." McCoy noted, giving Leonard a good once over.

McCoy fiddled with some equipment and turned it on Leonard, setting it to run automatically before also taking a more hands on look. Leonard glared and muttered the entire time, offering up his own commentary on occasion. Jim watched the entire exchange trying to muffle his laughter until both of them stopped to look at him with near identical glares.

Jim straightened and used the hand covering his mouth to wipe the smirk off.

"What? You should listen to the two of you bickering. It's friggin' hilarious. Bones, I've always said you were a lousy patient…I'm sure now, that I can even get  _ one o _ f you to agree with me on that one." He couldn’t help it. His lips twitched a few times before he gave in, allowing the smirk to return.

"You smug bastard, just you wait, Jim. I'll make sure your next physical will be the least enjoyable one you've ever had cause to experience." Leonard growled from the table he was sitting on, his shirt off – “And just w _ hy the hell is my shirt off?  _ He groused at the other doctor, _ “ _ That’s what tricorders are for, goddamnit!”

Jim had to smother more laughter to keep Leonard from turning on him. While he grudgingly submitted to the examination – Leonard would have been doing the same if their positions were reversed, Jim knew - Jim sat back to enjoy the view. The only thing that could be better was if there were _ two _ shirtless McCoy's and hey! That was now a possibility! He was lost in thought for a brief moment as he tried to figure out how to bring such an event about.

"Well, you're certainly more vulgar than I am." Dr. McCoy noted with a raised eyebrow. "You can put your shirt back on." Without so much as looking Jim’s way, he barked out, "Your turn."

While being examined, Jim took the opportunity to assuage his curiosity about this version of his Bones. He had the memories from the mind meld, as he had told his Leonard, but they were incomplete, and fading with time. Mostly, he remembered the images of the crew, and the feeling of deep affection Spock had held for them. And for him. That one still surprised him, but he had never told Leonard, not wanting him to feel insecure about their relationship.

"No. I never joined Starfleet. I was given my commission because I was an exceptional surgeon, and because of my work with alien biologies. My work in my field at the time was groundbreaking and there was a shortage of competent doctors coming through Starfleet back then. They were, I suppose you could say, just a mite desperate,” McCoy explained.

Finally, McCoy finished with Jim and moved on to Lieutenant Hendorff, allowing Jim to put his own shirt back on. Jim hopped down to rejoin Leonard, settling in beside as they both leaned against a table for a few quiet moments to themselves even though McCoy didn’t stop talking. Jim grabbed Leonards’ hand and gave it a squeeze. He wanted to kiss that worried furrowed brow and that tight-lipped purse right off his face but he held back, for Leonard’s sake.

"But I've never regretted it. Space is dangerous, sure, and transporters – don't get me  _ started  _ on those –“ McCoy ranted and Jim choked on a laugh, Leonard glaring at him. “- but the things I have seen, the people I have met and the things I have learned…. the lives saved alone from all our discoveries out here have been worth it."

Jim nudged Leonard with a grin. "See? I told you it was worth it. One day, you'll be thanking me for dragging your ass off of one of those fancy desk jobs and hauling you around space."

"Like hell I will." Leonard rolled his eyes and crossed his arms with a glare, before taking a peek at the data McCoy had been collecting. He dropped his arms and leaned forward a little bit more to get a closer look, then paused and gestured at the terminal with a questioning look on his face. "May I?"

"Be my guest,” McCoy drawled.

The terminal was different than the ones Jim was used to, older tech, but that didn’t really seem to stop Leonard. Despite his repeated and vocal aversion to technology, Leonard had proved more than once that he knew his way around a console. Today was no exception.

Besides, Jim knew, it wasn't so much an aversion to all technology as that he disliked how reliant people had become of it. He could understand that.

Between them, with Jim hovering over their shoulders to attempt to put in his two cents once in a while, Leonard and McCoy pulled up the reports and medical files of the appropriate personnel for a comparison with the newly created profiles of the three of them. Displaying them each side by side, disregarding personal histories, Leonard and McCoy combed through the stats of each person, Jim noting the physical dissimilarities with interest.

Before he could mention it, Leonard did.

"I expect a certain amount of dimensional shift, something that would denote which reality was the home reality of the people living there, but the physical differences are interesting to note. You've had experience with, uh, duplicates before, you said?" Leonard asked.

McCoy nodded. "Yeah, and I admit that I have never seen a bigger discrepancy in the looks of our counterparts as I have today, other than situational changes."

"Situational changes?" Jim looked at them both, waiting an explanation.

"Facial hair, scars, tattoos, piercings, hair lengths. Things that can change on a daily basis by situations or choice," Leonard explained while McCoy nodded. They might be the same person with different histories, but it was plain they understood each other.

"Right,” McCoy said. “Whereas things such as the natural hair color and type, eye color, facial structures, heights and skin tones all generally tend to be exactly the same."

"What about tanning? Or hair dyes?"

"Point. But for the most part, things like skin tones are still going to stay within a particular range for the expected norm of that skin type. My Jim is a little tanner then you are, but you would still both be listed in the old vernacular as Caucasian."

"Basically, Jim, the genetic level stays the same, with only a slight shift of certain spectrums that point at a home reality, something we resonate with. He's saying the changes between us all are too drastic. While Doctor McCoy and I  - god, that’s such a strange thing to be saying - are obviously the same person – we have the same names, mostly the same genetic background and personal history – there is a big enough difference in our physical appearances and attitudes that we would not be mistaken for the same man."

"Yet, you two obviously think along the same lines,” Jim pointed out. “So, do we have any idea how far off the axis we've gone and how it occurred?"

"That might be best discussed with the science department. But my bet? Is on the transporter," Doctor McCoy grumbled. Leonard grumbled agreement with him and the two opened their mouths at the same time, and Jim heard the double echo of two, similar growls of,

"It's always the goddamn transporter."


	3. Two Spocks or Not Two Spocks?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spock and Spock put their heads together to figure out what exactly happened while Kirk gets to know their redshirt a little better, content that two Spocks are better than one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i find writing spock to be hard -it so intimidating - what if i get him wrong? *nervous*

OS KIRK

They’d been at this for hours and Kirk had just taken a supervised break for food, dragging along their poor, beleaguered security detail of one while Spock had insisted he’d rather stay behind with Other Spock to work.

Forced to eat without Spock, Kirk had whiled the small break away from the technical speculation in trying to get to know the redshirt that had been randomly assigned to his away team that morning. He’d known his name was Heinz, but he soon learned the man’s name was Tobias, was the youngest of twelve and he was, in fact, a very recent graduate of the academy.

Kirk had been right about that and he wasn’t sure how to feel about it. The kid was nervous, well-meaning and eager – a lot like Chekov, actually. Both Chekovs, come to think of it. He shook his head and continued to listen to the nervously chattering ensign.

Poor kid had probably never even imagined a situation like this. He was handling it well, though. Kirk and Spock, though, were used to it. If it wasn’t mirror universes with evil versions of themselves, or shapeshifters, or android clones, or transporter glitches – well, that was to say, there was always something.

Now, though, the food run over, Kirk and Heinz had returned to the briefing room – under escort of course – where Kirk was currently being stared down by both Spocks, with Scotty at their side, along with some odd little creature Kirk had never seen before.

They’d immediately cornered him as soon as they’d reentered the room and Kirk was feeling rather ganged up on. Heinz, the lucky bastard, got to edge away from the intense group and stand aside.

Still, if they had answers, Kirk knew needed to listen. Despite what his officers seemed to think, he was very good at listening. It was just that he wasn't always good at taking their advice. It was a technicality they seemed incapable of understanding but one he exploited often.

"So, gentleman,” Kirk said into the silence. “What's the verdict?"

"It is my belief that there was something in the planet's atmosphere. Beaming down goes off without a hitch-"

"Aye, but coming back is a crapshoot." Scotty broke in. He ignored the dirty look both Spocks shot him, though they would both have denied ever having done such a thing if asked, but Kirk was well familiar with Spock and even his supposedly emotionless looks. If you knew him well enough, you could absolutely pinpoint what he was thinking all over his face, and it was a skill Kirk held that seemed to translate almost perfectly to his double.

Kirk didn’t even need the bond between himself and Spock to know that Scotty’s interjection had irritated him.

But it had, and it resonated over the bond easily.

Kirk cleared his throat. "Please elaborate?"

Other Spock stepped back to reveal a couple of those odd, transparent screens with data flowing over them. Kirk stepped closer to see the readouts as Other Spock spoke, pointing at first one, then another of the graphs.

"None of our usual tests are coming up with anything conclusive; however there are high levels of an unknown radiation in the upper levels of the atmosphere. It does not appear to be detrimental to living organisms, but it just may be affecting the transporter."

Other Spock stopped and the Kirk’s Spock picked up where he left off.

"There is also an unusual compound in the core of the planet. While consisting of several known substances, the existence of another, as of yet unknown substance, appears to be causing strange interactions, resulting in an intense magnetic pull," Spock said, pointing at another screen.

“We’re currently hypothesizing that the combination of the radiation and the magnetic pull might have affected the beams during transit, switching the two away parties mid-beam,” Scotty said with a grin. “It’s a pretty puzzle and the likelihood of it happening at all is… frankly, it’s amazing.”

Kirk stared at the three of them standing there all proud of themselves (yes, even the Spocks) as they continued to share their data and hypotheses. It was a strange thing to witness, but as the three of them devolved into technical babble that made even Kirk’s ears hurt – and he may not be an expert but he did his best to at least keep up in current knowledge – he knew he had to get them back on track before they forgot themselves in the beauty of the problem and lost sight of their goal.

"So, basically, you’re telling me that we don’t know what actually happened or what – “ Kirk waved at the the readouts for the unkown radiation in the atmosphere and the substance deep in the core – “any of that is, Spock?"

"That _is_ what I’m endeavoring to tell you, captain, yes. The planet’s core is dense, and even to these advanced scanners, readings on that compound are difficult to attain and we dare not risk another beam down for a closer look. As for the unknown radiation - it is fairly complex and has never before been recorded in this universe or, to my recollection, our own. It is taking the computers some time to break it down," Spock said with an endearing ‘not frown’.

"Right, right,” Kirk said thoughtfully, nodding along. “So, you're saying it has no name? Either of them?"

"Correct," said Other Spock.

"Well then, we get to name it, don't we?" Kirk rubbed his hands together gleefully. If he was able to suggest an appropriate or acceptable name, he'd be the only captain – the only person – in the history of Starfleet or the Federation to have named something in multiple dimensions. It was a goal he had never realized he had before but now needed to actually do.

Spock paused, a considering look on his face. He turned to Other Spock.

“The captain is correct,” Spock said. Kirk grinned triumphantly. “Since it is, in fact, our discovery – yours, mine, and Mister Scott’s – we do indeed get the honor of naming both unknown substances. While I do not have access to my ships records, I believe this is the only recordable instance as of yet that will enable people from different dimensions to confer and agree on something like this. It is a unique opportunity.”

“I have no record of such instances either,” Other Spock acknowledged. “But I rather think your captain is hoping to have the privilege of naming the substances currently undergoing analysis himself.”

Spock acknowledged Other Spock with a nod. “I believe you are correct. It would be quite the – I believe the term is – feather in his cap?”

“Ah, yes. I am familiar with this term. It seems appropriate here,” Other Spock agreed.

Kirk groaned, covering his face with one hand.

Why had he _ever_ thought _two_ Spock’s would be a great idea?

 


	4. A Different Kind of Green

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leonard learns about this universe's Spock and Jim and might be a little jealous... considering _his_ Jim apparently knew all along...

Leonard slammed a tray down next to Jim and growled. "It's lunchtime Jim."

"And?" Jim didn't even look up as he poked and prodded at his food with a suspicious look on his face. Leonard actually looked at his food and winced. If this was what they had to offer, Leonard didn’t blame him.

"Aaaand you made me a promise." At that, Jim looked up at his chief medical officer.

"It was a figure of speech Bones, I can't be expected to actually solve all the universes little problems before lunchtime. I just meant we'd be home before you knew it. I've got faith. I didn't think you'd go all literal on me now. Trying to take Spocks’ place are we? Since we seem to be down two at the moment?" Leonard spluttered in offense and his lover grinned. Another tray was placed next to theirs, followed by a second, as two more people joined them.

Jim smiled at the beautiful communications officer and Leonard tried to control the twisting unease in his gut. His Jim had tried many times during their Academy years to woo Nyota, and here she was, as far as Leonard could tell, unattached to anyone. He knew he shouldn't be jealous, but sometimes Leonard couldn't help comparing the now monogamous man with the playboy he'd been.

And Leonard couldn’t help but wonder if the captain that belonged to this reality was the same.

Across from her sat the Mr. Scott that had been the first to lay eyes on them. The differences between the people of both dimensions were definitely hit or miss but none yet were more disconcerting than Mr. Scott and Ensign Chekov.

Especially Chekov.

He glanced up to find that Hendorff was still off getting food and there was a small, discrete security detail standing by the rec room doors.

Leonard did his best to ignore them, but even the rec room on this version of the Enterprise was small and he was hard pressed to push them out of his mind when he couldn’t even push them out of his sight.

It was yet one more reminder of how off kilter everything was right now and he didn’t like it one bit!

Even if the puzzle it presented was fun on an intellectual level – oh goddamnit, now he sounded like Spock. He stabbed a fork into the goo on his plate and watched it jiggle and slide away from him. How the hell had they screwed up something so simple as  _ stuffing? _

"Takin' a break for some brain food?" Leonard dropped his unappetizing food back to his plate instead, asking the chief engineer as a way to distract himself.

"If ye'd like to call it that, aye." Mister Scott grinned at them, eating the food heartily.  _ My God _ , Leonard thought, his eyes nearly bulging out of his face,  _ How can he  _ **_eat_ ** _ that stuff? _

"I was hoping to hear about your reality, how different things are there from here," Uhura asked sweetly, leaning forward on her hand. She seemed more gentle and most definitely softer spoken than Nyota was, despite being the same person, and yet, Leonard was absolutely sure she had the same strong core and should never be underestimated.

"Um, well, I'm not really sure where I would even start, or even if we should,” Jim said, uncharacteristically nervous, looking at Leonard as if for guidance before looking back at the Lieutenant. "I mean, is it wise to trade too much information between our two universes? I know that – er… someone who is possibly from the future of this timeline was very reluctant to talk about his universe. And technically, all this _ is _ our future." Jim waved his hand to indicate everything around him.

Leonard grunted in approval as Jim kept Spock’s name out of things this time. He edged his fork into the mashed potatoes. At least they  _ looked  _ like they were supposed to.

"But surely there must be other things you can tell us?" She leaned in a little closer to Jim and Leonard dropped his fork, suddenly not hungry.

It was all he could do  _ not _ to growl, but he managed it, because that would have been discourteous of him to act that way towards his hosts. Still, the simple  _ tink _ of the fork hitting his plate grabbed the attention of the other three anyway and Uhura's eyes widened in surprise as she watched Jim, who was not her captain, reach over the table to gently snag Leonard’s hands in a reassuring – and very familiar - manner.

If Leonard had any inclinations towards blushing at this overt behavior, he would have probably been as red as a beat, but currently, he was too upset – with himself, the universe – to even feel embarrassment towards being this open in front of strangers.

"Bones…"

"It's all right Jim, I'm just…out of sorts.," Leonard said with a sigh, looking away, his anger draining away with the concern in Jim’s eyes. He thought about pulling his hand out from under Jim's but decided to leave it, needing the comfort.

Uhura's eyes softened as she stared at them, a sound of realization escaping her lips. "Oh… you and the doctor?"

Apparently, Leonard  _ could  _ still feel embarrassed enough to blush as he immediately turned red while Jim looked up and grinned cheekily at her. “Yup. Don’t know how I lucked out but, I’m not about to argue something in my favor.” Jim looked back at Leonard, giving him such a sickeningly, sappy look that he was forced to duck his face to hide how deep his blush was getting, if his hot cheeks were any indication.

"That's so sweet."  She leaned forward again, her chin in her hand as she smiled.

"I'm sorry, did I miss somethin'?" Mister Scott tried to mumble out of the side of his mouth, currently stuffed with – well, Leonard wasn’t sure but assumed it was food.

Maybe.

"Oh nothing, Mr. Scott, it’s just I always felt like there was something special between the captain and the doctor,” Uhura explained without taking her attention of Leonard and Jim. “Looks like your reality  _ is _ different after all.”

Leonard was beginning to feel like he was under a microscope. “You sayin’ we ain’t together in this reality?”

“Nope,” Mister Scott said cheerfully. “The captain and Mister Spock, however…”

"I…what?" Leonard spluttered, staring at Jim dumbfoundedly. Jim did not appear surprised in the slightest and was maybe even avoiding his eyes. Leonard's eyes narrowed.  _ Don’t be jealous, don’t be jealous. They are not the same people. Don’t be jealous, don’t be _ \- "Jim," he growled, "did you know about this?"

"Know about what Bones?" Jim looked over at Leonard under the watchful eyes of pretty much everyone in the rec room. Wonderful.

Hendorff rolled his eyes. “God, you two are about as subtle as a Klingon,” he stated as he dug into his own heaping plate of food eagerly.

It made Leonards stomach churn to watch.

The security man looked up, food hanging out of his mouth till he slurped it back in. "What? Never seen anyone eat before? Gotta keep up on my calories. Security is hard work."

Jim shook his head and Leonard had to agree with him.

Scotty still looked lost as Uhura watched them with shining, gleeful eyes. "It's just so sweet seeing the two of you. I think  _ our _ doctor could use someone in his life. He only really seems to be truly happy when he's around the Captain or Mister Spock. As much as he grumbles and argues with them, I think honestly, he enjoys it."

"Oh, if your Doctor McCoy is anything like mine," Jim huffed out a laugh with an affectionate look at Leonard, "He's  _ definitely _ happiest when he has something to complain about. And Spock and I do rather set him off quite often."

"Laugh it up Jim, I know where you sleep."

“I should hope so,” Jim said softly.


	5. Lonely Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lieutenant Uhura is a little worried over Doctor McCoy's state of mind, with the other Jim and Leonard being on board.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter has brief Chapel/Uhura 
> 
> i wasn't sure that would be good to add into the tags cause it's really... brief? And some people seem to have a problem in general with ships that are tagged that aren't significant. and other people have issues if they get blindsided by even the mere mention of a ship they don't like, so i'm never sure what to do...or how much of a significant part counts for getting tagged? Like, i did tag Nyota/Spock, but it does get brought up more than once.. but i'm also thinking it might fall more into not significant enough?? I don't know. Sorry guys.

**OS Uhura**

* * *

 

Unfortunately, but not unsurprisingly, answers were not exactly forthcoming in a timely fashion.

Though Lieutenant Uhura was not involved in the breakdown process of figuring things out, as communications officer, she was party to just about everything going down around it.

And having met the strangers herself, she couldn’t stop thinking about them.

It was definitely a nice change of pace to have a situation where the duplicates, so to speak, weren’t actually evil or out for anyone’s blood. Several years serving under Captain Kirk and she’d lost count of the number of shapeshifters, androids, and transporter accidents that had led to duplicates running amok on board the Enterprise.

But it did make for some interesting betting pools aboard ship.

Ones that the rest of the crew took great pains in not letting the captain or Mister Spock become aware of. Spock because he would disapprove, the captain, because he would want to be involved and always had a way of coming out on top.

Doctor McCoy, of course, discretely kept their secret, though he declined to actually participate.

And speaking of Doctor McCoy…

She still couldn’t get over the fact that the captain and the doctor were together in the other universe. When pressed about Spock, they’d both clammed up.

Personally, she always had this idea that the three of them should be together. But somehow, the captain seemed to be the pivotal point the other two gravitated around. Here it was Spock, there it was Doctor McCoy, and in each place was someone left out in the cold.

That had actually been the first bet she’d lost. When Doctor McCoy had originally come aboard, she could have sworn she’d seen some sparks fly and yet…

And yet he was alone and the captain and Mister Spock were together instead. It had surprised her, seeing as the stoic Vulcan had avoided any and all romantic attachments for as long as she’d known him. That the meticulously observant first officer had seemingly been oblivious to the fact that over half the ship – male, female and everything in between – had been in love with him.

Uhura might have sighed wistfully after him once or twice herself.

Somehow, she was never sure how, Spocks’ respect had given way to affection and later more – stoic exterior or not, Uhura recognized the signs of someone in love. It was just much harder to detect in Mister Spocks’ case.

But fall in love he had. With the captain.

Mister Spock was discrete, of course, something he held in common with the doctor, but the captain had given it all away through fond looks and soft touches – _that Spock had returned when he thought no one was looking._

It slowly became a widely known secret aboard the ship, one they protected around strangers as much as possible to keep them from intruding on the personal lives of the captain and Mister Spock. Something Scotty had absently broken in the presence of the other versions of their beloved captain and his doctor.

Now, true, it wasn’t as if them knowing was going to change anything about the current situation aboard the Enterprise. There was no one else to spill the secret to, and even if they did back in their universe, what would it matter.

Still, Uhura couldn’t shake the look on the other Doctor McCoy’s face when it had become clear that _this_ Doctor was all alone. Like the idea of not being with his captain was physically painful and utterly terrifying.

Stopping by sickbay on her way back to her quarters wasn’t _exactly_ on the way, but for some reason, she’d felt an absolute need to see Doctor McCoy. _Their_ doctor, not the other one.

She frowned when she reached sickbay to find that Doctor McCoy wasn’t there.

“He’s gone for a walk,” Nurse Chapel called as soon as the doors wooshed open and Uhura walked inside.

“How is he, Christine?” Uhura asked, not bothering to wonder how Chapel had known why she was there.

Chapel sighed, her hands stilling in her task and turning to Uhura. “As well as can be, having proof of what he could have shoved in his face – a reminder that it's _him_ that doesn’t have it.”

“It’s got to hurt,” Uhura said softly.

Shrugging, Chapel turned away again to resume her task. “He’ll… well, I won’t say he’ll get over it, but he’s stubborn and strong. And he has people who care for him. He’ll manage.”

Uhura joined the nurse, soothing a hand up her back to rest on her shoulders. Chapel paused again, her head hanging slightly.

“He’s been an absolute bear since they’ve been here. Grumbling and easily provoked. I… may have suggested the walk to clear his head since he refused to talk about it. You know how he is,” Chapel said.

“You’re a good friend, Christine. Why don’t I go look for him, make sure he’s okay?” Uhura suggested, dropping her hand away.

Chapel turned to face Uhura with a quirking little grin. “You were going to do that anyway,” she pointed out.

“Maybe so, but if _you_ need anything, you’ll let me know, right?” Uhura asked.

“Of course, sweet,” Chapel said, smiling. She set down the datapad she’d been working with and spun about to give Uhura her full attention, taking Uhura in her arms. Uhura nearly melted into the embrace, but Chapel was working and Uhura had another task to get too. She settled, instead, for a brief kiss and another reassuring hug before departing sickbay.

She pondered where to head first. If he was going for an actual walk, his quarters wouldn’t be the direction to go. If it was aimless, then all her ponderings would amount to nothing and if it weren’t aimless –

Or no, that was it.

Even aimless wandering could be directed by the subconscious and with what – in particular – was on his mind, she suddenly had an idea of where he might be. Whether he wished to be there or not.

Hurrying along the corridors, Uhura made her way up several decks till she arrived at the VIP section, where Sulu had given the other captain and his doctor a room of their own for the night.

Sure enough, there he was.

Standing frozen in the hallway, his face a naked thing full of grief, loneliness, wistfulness and despair as tears streamed down his cheeks.

“Oh, doctor,” Uhura breathed out. He didn’t hear her, but as she drew closer, she could hear what had him frozen in place. Her eyes widened. She’d have to talk to ships maintenance about soundproofing later, but for now, she had to get him out of here.

She reached out for his arm as soon as she was beside him and he jerked, stumbling as he twisted about to face her. His eyes were glassy and wet and not _really_ seeing her as he scrubbed at them, his breathing ragged.

She reached for him again, the way she would a startled animal. “Doctor McCoy?” she said gently.

He blinked once, twice, then let out a choked breath, closing his eyes against the sight of her, wincing as a particularly loud groan wafted into the corridor.

“Let’s go someplace else, all right?” Uhura said, tugging gently at his arm until he suddenly moved, pulling her in his wake as he rushed to get out of the corridor.

When they were finally out of ear shot, he paused, falling against the wall and covering his face in his hands. He took a deep, shuddering breath, then another. It took Doctor McCoy several long moments in that thankfully empty corridor to bring himself back under the control she was most used to seeing, to bring back the mask he usually wore.

A mask that was showing more cracks than usual.

Would this be the last straw? The thing that broke Doctor McCoy and sent him running from the Enterprise? From the captain?

“Do you want to talk about it?” she offered once his breathing had returned mostly to normal.

“Not really,” he said gruffly, pushing off the wall. His steps were quick and she scrambled to keep up with him. He glanced down at her irritably, though she could see the loneliness and defeat in the droop of his eyes. “I don’t need an escort to my own quarters.”

“Of course not, doctor. But I was heading to mine and they _are_ on the same deck,” Uhura pointed out. “My shift _is_ over, after all.”

“Hmmph,” he grunted, not looking down at her again as they walked. The silence was filled with unspoken words, ready to burst. The arrived at deck five and Uhura stopped first.

“Good night, Doctor McCoy,” she said.

Her door had just barely opened when he answered.

“Wait… maybe I… I think I _will_ take you up on your offer. Lord knows bottling it up hasn’t done me any favors and my usual confidant is, for obvious reasons, not much of a good idea,” he said, his voice rough. His back was turned to her, but he stood stock still in the corridor.

“Of course, doctor,” she agreed. “Where – “

She stopped as he moved, striding towards his own quarters and she followed along. Rumor had it that Doctor McCoy had a fairly large liquor stash hidden away in his quarters, not that he abused it. She had a feeling she was about to find out the truth of those rumors.


	6. It’s the Plan, We Planned It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They've come up with a plan and both McCoys weigh in on what they _really_ think about it...

AOS JIM

Despite the strange ship, Jim still woke early, Leonard deeply asleep in his arms. He smoothed the dark hair back away from Leonards’ face, staring with a loopy grin at the open-mouthed snoring coming from Leonard.

A pang hit him at the thought of having made this routine away mission without Leonard. If they were stuck here, if they should never get home, the idea that he and Leonard could have been forever separated was awful.

No, he wasn’t going to think like that. They  _ hadn’t  _ been separated, Leonard  _ was  _ here, and the Enterprise crew were the smartest, most capable people he knew, hands down no matter which universe they were from. Never minding the fact that they were down a First Officer

Jim could only imagine the brain power going on in his own universe right now, with two Spocks bending their minds together at the same problem. He only hoped that Scotty could keep them on task and not get lost in the fascinating minutiae of the issue at hand.

Whatever those were.

He should probably move, get the day started. He should probably drag Leonard out of bed, hit the shower – VIP suite meant it was a real shower, and nice and big too, even on this smaller, more compact Enterprise – and then go off in search of breakfast before getting back to work on their predicament.

Even though it wasn’t their area of expertise, another set of eyes and a different viewpoint could work wonders.

Jim had once seen a group of Starfleet geniuses get stumped on a particularly troubling and difficult quantum physics problem, when a non-expert had asked the right ‘dumb’ question at the right time, snapping the geniuses out of their locked pattern. In explaining, condescendingly one might add, how  _ ‘that just wouldn’t work’ _ to the poor dumb schmuck who happened to ask the question, they’d paused, finally able to consider everything from a new angle.

After being stumped for over a week, they’d solved the issue in 3 hours.

And sure, the man who’d asked the question never could have solved the problem at all, but without him, without that key perspective, the scientists would never have made their leap.

So no, Jim never discounted anybody. It was a reason why Leonard always felt free to weigh in on things he had no training in - why he would argue with Spock till they were blue in the face – because he, too, understood that and when he did, it often got Spock  _ thinking  _ in new directions.

Leonard was, himself, a genius, and never to be underestimated. Jim was damn lucky to have the irascible doctor at his side.

For more than just that, of course. Leonards’ pessimistic sarcasm hid a core of gentleness, loyalty and caring far beyond anything that Jim had every experienced before. That he loved Jim, of all people, still took Jim’s breath away.

Lost in these thoughts, it took Jim far too long to realize that Leonard’s eyes were open and that he was staring up at Jim with amusement, a raised eyebrow, a quirk of his pursed lips.

“You gonna stare at me all day, or do we got someplace to be, darlin’?”

“Hmm… There are worse things to spend my time staring at,” Jim joked, leaning down to kiss Leonard.

Leonard kissed him back as eagerly as he had the night before, when they’d taken great comfort in the familiarity of each other’s arms, took their time to worship each other lovingly.

Soon enough, though, duty pulled at both of them and they pulled away with a series of short, gentle kisses that neither wanted to stop.

It was Leonard who finally had the strength to put a stop to the kisses, pushing Jim away gently to swing his legs over the edge of the bed and stand, stretching in all his naked glory for Jim to see.

Snorting, Leonard grabbed his clothes and padded over to the shower. “Get yer mind out of the gutter. We got work to do if we’re going to get out of this, this…”

Jim pointed a finger at Leonard. “Don’t insult her! She may not be  _ our  _ Enterprise, but she’s  _ still  _ the Enterprise.”

“Fine,” Leonard said, rolling his eyes. He stepped into the other room, his voice floating out. “You coming or what?”

Jim scrambled after Leonard with a grin.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

After breakfast found Jim and Leonard in Mister Scott and Ensign Chekov’s capable hands. They spent the morning running scan comparisons, checking over Doctor McCoy’s data and were generally stumped.

It was only Leonard’s repeated mantra of “Never trust the transporter” that kept them from giving up entirely.

Jim pointed at a spike during the beam up, comparing it to the original beam down. “Look, that radiation in the atmosphere acts a lot like, like clouds, forming moving pockets. The beam down shows a direct line between pockets but here – “

“Aye, I see what yer sayin’. The beam up went right through the thickest part of the radiation cloud, for sure,” Mister Scott agreed. “I bet if we’d done that on beam down, this would only have happened sooner.”

“But  _ how _ , Mister Scott?” Ensign Chekov asked plaintively. “It doesn’t make sense! No radiation should be able to punch a hole between two different universes, to swap people around who aren’t even from the same point of time!”

Mister Scott rubbed at his chin thoughtfully. “I dunno about that, lad. It’s been done before. And the rules of time travel make even less sense to me, but we’ve also seen a few different ways to do that as well.”

Jim shook his head at the very casual way this crew talked of things like time travel. “So, if beaming through one of those pockets landed us here, then wouldn’t reversing the process land us back where we belong?”

“Aye, it’s possible,” Mister Scott acknowledged slowly.

“Well, if it’s as easy as that, then why didn’t we do that in the first place? I may not like the damn things, but it seems the most reasonable place to start,” Leonard asked.

“Because a few circuits fried when we beamed you outta there and we had to stop and repair them anyway. We’ve been sending test samples down to the planet since 0600 this morning, but not all of them have come back intact,” Scotty explained.

Leonard paled.

He rounded on Jim. “Oh no, not a good idea. How do we know that thing isn’t going to go on the fritz with  _ us  _ in the beam?”

“Relax, Bones,” Jim said, clapping Leonard on the shoulder. “We’ll run a few more tests till we get the bugs worked out and everything’ll be fine.”

“You wanna scramble my molecules in a device that hasn’t been reassembling them properly and you’re telling me to  _ relax _ ?” Leonard said incredulously, his voice raising nearly ever word. “Fat chance of that.”

It was noon before Mister Scott declared the transporter fit for organic life once more, the last five tests having come back perfectly.

Calling the rest of the bridge crew, Acting Captain Sulu and the strangely absent Doctor McCoy to the briefing room, Jim sat beside an antsy Leonard as they waited. Leonard tapped on the table, surely wishing for a drink to sooth his nerves, but Jim had a better idea.

He reached for Leonard's hand, curling his fingers around Leonards’ and pulling him to lean into Jim’s shoulder. Leonard sighed, the fingers tightening in Jim’s.

The door opened to admit 4 other people – Uhura, Sulu, Dr. McCoy and Spock’s replacement – Sulu having to send their security detail to wait outside as the small room was crowded all too quickly.

Jim frowned when Doctor McCoy sat at the table, avoiding their eyes, noting that Uhura sat beside him, keeping a careful eye on the doctor.

Despite being engrossed in his datapad, Jim could see that Doctor McCoy really looked like shit.

Had he been up all night working on this problem? Perhaps, but if so, then why hadn’t he been there with them in the morning? He shook his head. This wasn’t Jim’s problem, even though the change in the open, talkative doctor from yesterday to a rundown, quiet looking one had him concerned.

What had changed?

Was it them?

From the chatter of the rest of the crew, things like this seemed so commonplace as to not be all that worrisome. So it must be something else.

Again. Not his problem, no matter that it was McCoy. Jim had to look out for his  _ own  _ Leonard.

Pushing aside McCoy’s pain and the urge to discover the cause of it was difficult, but he managed.

“Gentleman. Lieutenant,” Jim gave a nod to the communications officer. He ignored the kick to his shin, giving nothing more than a mumbled aside of "It's called being polite, Bones. Calm down, there's nothing to be jealous over. I thought your southern manners would be in total agreement here?"

“Southern manners still agree that you keep your eyes in your head,” Leonard muttered.

Clearing his throat, Mister Sulu spoke. “I take it we have good news?”

"We have…something, anyway,” Chekov answered. Despite working with him all morning and the better part of the day before, Jim still couldn’t reconcile this black-haired, sullen ensign with an obsession with all things Russian (Whether they were or not) with the blonde, curly haired, bubbly boy back in their own reality.

"We've come to the conclusion that it was, indeed, a transporter incident, exacerbated by some unknown compounds on the planet itself." Mister Scott slid a pad over to the acting captain.

Jim didn’t need to look at it to know what it contained. Instead, he stared at the datapad, ruminating at how old it looked but how it was still familiar, still functional.  

Mister Sulu scrolled through the data. After a thorough skimming, he placed it back down on the table and looked around him at all the heads staring back at him. Like Jim’s own helmsman, this Sulu didn’t let the scrutiny phase him..

"So that's the plan? Beam back down to the planet and see if we can duplicate the same event in reverse?" Mister Sulu asked.

Leonard fingers tightened in horror around Jim’s, his face resigned. Not that that stopped him from complaining about the plan. He wouldn’t be Leonard if he wasn’t complaining about the transporter or some fool brained scheme of the captains. Point – Jim didn’t think his plans were  _ that  _ bad.

"I still think y’all are out of your corn-fed minds!" he snapped, "Trustin' to blind hope that just going through the motions with somethin' as fickle as a transporter will fix  _ everythin' _ ?"

"It's not blind hope, Bones. You saw the data."

"It is sound scientific theory," Mister Scott said defensively.

"Like hell it is."

"I'm in full agreement with my counterpart here. This sounds like reckless experimentation to me. We're practically _ inviting _ disaster!" Doctor McCoy groused out his agreement, the first time he’d spoken since he’d entered the briefing room. The first time he looked up, his eyes flashing dangerously, but god, if Jim had thought he’d looked bad before, he’d been mistaken.

McCoy’s eyes were sunken, with generous bags. They were also red rimmed.

"Don't worry Doc, Docs? It looks like we’ve already successfully implemented our transporter test escalation plan." Sulu interrupted. "Scotty's our top transporter expert. He's on top of it."

"Och, aye, it's easy." Mister Scott agreed. He dropped a pad down and slid it across the table towards Jim and his own grousing doctor. Hendorff just sat back, content to let his Captain handle everything. "There’s all the data for the transports."

Jim skimmed the new pad and looked up with a grin, showing it to Leonard.

"Sounds like we have a plan. Let's get going then, shall we?"


	7. Stubbornness and Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They're getting closer to a solution, but is it really necessary to risk _more_ people on another trip down to the surface and back?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> coming up with fake names for things is HARD

OS KIRK POV

Kirk was in the middle of an epic stare down between two Spocks. As if being on the receiving end of that piercing gaze from one Spock wasn't bad enough, now it had been compounded and Kirk wasn't entirely sure Vulcan's even needed to blink.

But he wasn't backing down.

"No,” Kirk said flatly, folding his arms over his chest and planting his feet. “There is no good reason for _all_ of us to beam down. You'd be putting yourself at risk. You don't have to go, Spock, but _we_ do.”

“You are as stubborn as your counterpart,” Other Spock noted.

“He is, indeed, quite stubborn,” Spock agreed. “A trait that has, nonetheless, yielded results far more often than they should.”

Kirk rolled his eyes. _Talk about the kettle_ … amused irritation eased over the bond and he sighed.

“Look, we already know that it is an equivalent body mass exchange. And that it isn't remotely concerned with having the same counterparts to make a matching set. Otherwise, this would never have happened to begin with. You’ve fixed the transporter, you’ve analyzed the Destenium Radiation and the Alsametriac particles or whatever they are to infinity and back, you’ve done your experiments and all of that was critical for the next step toward returning us to our own reality,” Kirk said, “but there is no reason for you to be joining us, Commander."

"I beg to differ, Jim,” Spock said. “While I understand your need to protect as many as you can, often at great detriment of yourself, in this case, I find Commander Spocks logic to be impeccable.”

Other Spock inclined his head. “Thank you, Commander.” He turned briskly to face a screen. “As you are aware, the next radiation cloud with the same mix as the one you initially beamed through is due in only a few hours, give or take sudden changes in atmospheric pressure. We, as of yet, do not have enough observational data to predict when the next might form but we are, in fact, on a schedule. The Enterprise is due at Starbase 27* for a diplomatic conference in less than a week. If we don’t act now, the two of you may very well be stuck here for a while.”

“That still has nothing to do with you coming along for the ride,” Kirk pointed out.

“True,” Other Spock acknowledged. “Mister Scott, Dr. M’Benga, please enumerate your conclusions about the scans on our guests in comparison with the radiation in question.”

“Well,” Scotty said, scratching at his head. “We still don’t know _what_ it does to organic life. But we know it played merry havoc with the transporter, as you know, and if it should happen again, you may be stranded there for a couple of days.”

Dr. M’Benga leaned forward when Scotty paused and looked over to him. In a calm, soothing voice, he picked up Scotty’s threat as Kirk listened intently.

“The radiation left a residue behind in your bodies. Continued attempts at beaming through the thick of it means that you’ll be accumulating more. While, for now, it doesn’t seem to be adversely affecting you,” Dr. M’Benga admitted, “we really just don’t know and another trip could have disastrous side effects we’re not aware of.”

Other Spock nodded. “And that is why I must accompany you. I will risk no one else, but you _must_ have somebody on hand who is not as saturated with the radiation as you are, in case you require assistance.”

"It is a sound, if somewhat emotional theory, Jim." The other Spock noted quietly and calmly. Jim narrowed his eyes at both Spocks.

"It is times like these that I miss Dr. McCoy. I feel…unbalanced somehow. Two of you arguing the same point instead of opposite sides of the point…this isn't working for me. Fine!" Kirk threw his hands up in the air. "We'll do it your way Mister and Mister Spock. But what happens if _our_ crew beams down an extra man as well? Then this Spock would be at just as much of a risk to undergoing what _we_ have."

"It is highly unlikely that such will occur." His Spock said with assurance.

"But it could." Kirk pointed out.

"I do not believe it will be an issue." The other Spock said firmly.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Standing in the transporter room only an hour later, Kirk, Spock and Heinz waited for Other Spock and Scotty to arrive.

Spock did first, walking briskly up to the transporter pad.

A moment later, the door wooshed open again, quieter than the ones on Kirks’ Enterprise, but instead of the expected Scotty, Nyota walked in with a storm on her face.

Kirk took an involuntary step back.

“Would you really leave without saying goodbye?” she said to Other Spock.

“I sent you – “

“A message, yes, telling me about the away mission you were joining. That is not a proper goodbye, Spock,” Nyota said.

Kirk blinked at the sudden déjà vu. He recalled similar conversations with Spock in the early days and months of their fledgling relationship. Navigating the waters of human and Vulcan customs and ways had been difficult and fraught with misunderstanding, but eventually they had struck a balance.

“Commander Spock told me a little of how they met,” Spock said, leaning in close so that Kirk could hear his low-pitched voice. Kirk hoped that Other Spock and Nyota were too preoccupied to over hear anything Spock and he might say. “It was while Lieutenant Uhura was still at the Academy, going through a series of advanced xenolinguistics courses. He and the other you he met after, and immediately clashed. I got the impression that the Captain Kirk of this reality has… had a bit more of a difficult life history than you have had, though he would not elaborate. I gather it has left the captain of this reality a somewhat different man than you are.”

 _Is my love – our love – really so fickle a thing, that such a small thing as that could sway my – our – affections elsewhere?_ Kirk wondered. An unsettled feeling rose in him, pushing into his bond to Spock despite his best efforts to contain it and Spock turned to him with a quirked eyebrow.

“Are you all right, Jim?” he asked quietly. “Should I have not told you any of this? I do not wish to bring you any distress.”

“I…” Kirk looked at Other Spock and Nyota standing close, his eyes drawn to where their hands touched. He didn’t know if others aboard ship understood the significance of that, but he sure as hell did and it unbalanced him to see Nyota and Other Spock staking their claim on each other in front of Kirk and _his_ Spock.

“Is it selfish of me, that I don’t wish to share you? In any reality? That seeing you with her… even knowing it’s not _you…_ makes me jealous?” Kirk whispered hoarsely.

“Jim,” was all Spock said, but unconditional love and reassurance flooded the bond between them and Jim nearly gasped at the depth of the feeling.

Suddenly, Nyota pulled away from Other Spock, cocked her head at Kirk and said, “A word, captain.”

It wasn’t a request.

Surprised, and also curious as to what she could suddenly have to say to him, Kirk swallowed his jealousy and followed her out of the transporter room. They stopped in the empty corridor just outside the door and stepped to the side so it wouldn’t activate while they talked.

“Yes, Lieutenant?” Kirk asked.

“Do you truly love him?” She asked.

He blinked. “Of course I do. How could you doubt – the bond alone would out me if I didn’t – “

She raised her hand and he abruptly stopped talking. “I know all about the bond and how it works. I share it with my Spock. If he’s anything like my Spock, just… promise me… you _will_ take care of him,” she said. Her eyes bore into him.

“We take care of _each other_ ,” he answered, shocked by the order. “Look, I appreciate your concern, and I can even understand the need to make sure the ones you love are okay, but I don’t need anyone butting into my life and assuming things without knowing anything about me. About _us._ ”

“You’re different than he is,” she mused. “ _Our_ captain, I mean. I can’t put my finger on it exactly, but you are. Take care of yourself too and don’t let him do any self-sacrificing bull shit.”

Kirk relented, letting out a breath. “I’ll do my best. Just as I trust you will as well.”

“Of course, there was never any need to ask,” she said. “Good luck.”

“To you as well,” Kirk replied. They shared a mutual nod and then she turned and walked away. Bemused, Kirk reentered the transporter room just as Scotty rushed in behind him.

Looked like it was time to go.


	8. The Planet Below

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both away teams beam back down to the planet and converge on each other. Jim gives Kirk something to think about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> almost done!

**AOS Jim**

Several hours later, Jim found himself back on the planet with two McCoy’s at his side and Hendorff, facing off with two Spocks, his other self and a redshirt from security.

“Spock!” Jim called out cheerfully. “Damn good to see you.”

“It is pleasing to see that you are well,” Spock - his Spock, a little younger than the other, Jim noted - responded.

“Well, isn’t this dandy. Two of everybody,” Doctor McCoy grumped.

“Ah, Doctor McCoy,” the older Spock said, “I take it our Mister Scott came to the same conclusion that we did, in which a home reality anchor may be necessary to enable us to lock onto the right realities during beam up.”

Doctor McCoy snorted. “Like a horses patootie! I’m here because I should never have let the two out of my sight. You  _ always _ get into trouble when you're unsupervised. You can’t deny that!”

“But we’re not hurt!” Kirk protested cheerfully. “We were just a tad misplaced.”

Jim chuckled at the exchange and Leonard elbowed him.

“Forget it, Jim. He’s right. I’m never letting either of you out of my sight if I can help it. The trouble you get into is phenomenal. You I expect it from. Him…” Leonard shook his head.

The two security men looked at each other and shrugged and Jim felt sorry for the two of them, caught up in a situation where neither of them likely had any sort of guidelines for how to proceed.

“I’m Tobias Heinz,” the one Jim didn’t recognize offered.

“Hendorff,” Cupcake grunted.

So, two of everybody except for the security detail. Jim hadn’t been willing to take the bet they were the same despite how different some of the alternate reality folks were from the ones he knew.

Chekov, in particular, he still couldn’t get over.

Speaking of, Kirk strode forward turning to address both away parties at the same time and Jim stared.

“Gentleman,” Kirk said. He was definitely older than Jim – then again, except for Chekov, all of their counterparts were older – and he seemed a bit… softer, somehow, though he stood tall and straight and firm.  _ Are we really the same man _ ? Jim continued to stare, and their eyes caught briefly _. Oh… _

Kirks’ eyes weren’t the eyes of a man who’d been through the things Jim had. Not that he hadn’t been through stuff –  _ oh let him have missed Tarsus IV, of all things to experience  _ – that much was obvious, but there was a certain air, a lightness to his demeanor and his eyes that had Jim realizing they were and were not the same man.

Whatever the differences between their realities, it had made quite an impact. Some of Ambassador Spocks’ memories resurfaced, broken and choppy, getting more and more fragmented as time went on, but some things were still clear.

Some differences were glaring.

Kirk had, indeed, suffered through Tarsus, but he’d had his family in the aftermath to help him recover.

His family. The family Jim had never experienced with an absent mother, a dead hero for a father and a string of no good boyfriends and strict stepdads. Kirk hadn’t had to grow up with expectations of greatness, hadn’t grown up living in a shadow and become his mother’s disappointment.

Nor had he witnessed the mass destruction of an entire planet. There was more, but it all turned into a jumble of images Jim couldn’t parse.

A hand touched his arm, Leonard looking at him in concern. Jim shook his head and kept his attention on Kirk.

Heedless of Jim’s internal monologue, Kirk continued speaking. “I think I have detected a flaw in our otherwise carefully thought out plan. I don't think this –“ he gestured at the two away teams standing face to face – “was supposed to happen. So, if we're all on the same planet at the same time, then which reality are we in and how do we contact the other ship?”

“This  _ is  _ unexpected,” the younger Spock said. “However, Commander Spock and I discussed several probabilities with Mister Scott and we have recalibrated some equipment that should pick up the appropriate frequencies for each universe. Doctor M’Benga programmed our equipment using the data he was able to glean from a comparison between Commander Spock and I.”

“We did the same,” Jim said cheerfully, reaching behind them to pick up the box Mr. Scott had beamed down with them. “We should compare notes. How much time do we have? We weren’t able to get an exact prediction with the scans we took.”

Both Spocks looked down at their tricorders, the tech so different it made Jim marvel and wonder why their universe, despite being a few years behind the alternate reality he’d found himself in, seemed to have technology that had evolved faster and along slightly different lines.

“If our calculations are correct, the next spike should occur in approximately 2 hours, 29 minutes and 43 seconds,” the older Spock said.

“All right then!” Jim clapped his hands together. “Plenty of time to get to know each other.”

“Captain, I must object. I will be too busy monitoring the atmosphere for – “ Jim’s Spock protested.

“Don’t worry about it, Spock . Set an alarm for 2 hours and 10 minutes from now. That should be sufficient warning,” Jim noted.

Spock snapped his mouth shut and stared at Jim coolly, that damn eyebrow raised in a manner Jim was certain was an emotional response. The other Spock took in their interaction gravely and leaned in lightly to speak so quietly that no one else could hear.

Kirk was staring too, Jim noticed. Damn, it was just  _ so weird _ seeing an older version of himself – though it was at least a little less weird seeing as they weren’t quite sporting the same look as the other. Kirk frowned at Jim disapprovingly.

Oh, that’s right. In  _ their _ universe, the two of them were an item. It seemed odd to him that it would be so, even though he’d already seen it in Ambassador Spocks’ mind a few years back. The sheer depth of their love – or at least Spocks’ love for  _ his  _ captain – rivaled the love Jim held for Leonard.

It spoke to him that maybe the two universes and their counterparts, were more different than he’d otherwise observed, outside of the peculiar technology discrepancies. No, he already knew. The memories that had surfaced had proven to him that Jim and Kirk were two different people. Still…

He looked over at the older McCoy, whom he’d noted had avoided him as much as he possibly could outside his official capacity as the ship’s doctor, and felt heartbroken when he thought to why.

That McCoy obviously loved Jim’s counterpart was clear. How alone must that make him feel? To watch Jim and Spock be together? He must have resigned himself to it, somehow, because Leonard was good at things like that and why wouldn’t the other version of him be as well? And then came along Jim and Leonard – very much in love, and  _ very  _ obviously together.

It must have torn him up inside to watch the two of them and know he’d never have that.

Jim continued to observe things as the two parties mingled about, the niggling of an idea pushing at his brain. He let it simmer and continued to watch, knowing it would come soon enough but that it had something to do with Doctor McCoy.

Hendorff and Heinz stood at attention, scanning the beam down area attentively while Spock and Spock – despite Jim’s command to mingle – were bent over some equipment, fiddling with the dials.

Honestly, he’d known that would happen.

Kirk remained at Spock’s side and that left…

The doctors. There was no avoiding anyone now, and Leonard and Doctor McCoy stood together, both of them hovering over the working pair and making snarky remarks before looking at each other with startled faces.

Jim smiled, unable to contain the heart eyes for either of the doctors. No matter which universe, it appeared that grumpy, pessimistic, soft hearted McCoy’s would always be a constant. It made his heart hurt that the other had never found the love he so well deserved.

Wandering closer to better observe, Jim tuned back in to the conversation.

“I assure you, doctors, that the science behind this is sound,” both commanders spoke in unison – paused in their work, faced each other with a single quirked brow each – and turned back. “We would never presume to risk the lives of anyone if circumstances were not in our favor.”

“But are they really?” Leonard snarked.

“Easy Bones,” Jim said, sliding a hand along his back soothingly. He had to refrain from laughing about the moment the two Spocks had had - how of all of them, they were the most alike - knowing that Leonard would think Jim was laughing at  _ him  _ and then Jim would find himself regretting that later.

He continued to lurk, to watch and observe, and slowly the idea came to him. He watched everyone interacting - particularly the other Spock, Kirk and McCoy - and couldn’t believe he hadn’t seen it before.

Couldn’t believe  _ they  _ hadn’t seen it. Then again, maybe they were all too close to see clearly. How’d that saying go? Can’t see the forest for the trees.

Maybe he could give them a little push? Determined and now armed with at least half a plan, Jim got Kirks attention and motioned for Kirk to follow him and they stepped away just a little, just enough to show that their talk was private, but not enough to put them at risk of anything indigenous.

“Why?” Jim asked Kirk, both of them still looking at both doctors gesticulating wildly and with passion.

“Why? What do you want me to tell you? They’re both good men – the best even – but Spock and I, we have history. You don’t know the kinds of things we’ve been through, even before we met Bones, or how Spock struggles. Your Spock, he’s already got someone who can be there for him while he fights himself,” Kirk spoke softly, though they both knew that both Vulcans were probably hearing every word.

There was no helping how sharp their ears were, Jim acknowledged, and it would be irresponsible to wander any further from the rest of the group to attain any measure of privacy. Both captains were perfectly capable of taking care of themselves – despite what either McCoy might insinuate on his more irritable days – but it could delay their time table if anything happened while they did.

“Okay, but where’s that leave Bones?” Jim pressed. “Is the entire difference here who got there first? Doesn’t that intimate that there’s a strong bond between all 3 of…well…us?” Jim paused and shook his head. “You know what I mean.”

Kirk’s eyes narrowed thoughtfully and Jim cleared his throat, clapping him on the shoulder. “Why don’t I just let you think about it a bit.”

“Why?”

Jim paused and blinked. “Uh… what?”

“What exactly was that little pep talk supposed to accomplish other than to make me feel guilty about Bones? Of course I want him to be happy, he’s my best friend,” Kirk spat out, glaring at Jim.

“Is he, though? Cause it seems to me he’s pretty damn lonely and sad. Did you even  _ notice  _ that?” Jim pressed. “Have you thought about  _ why  _ that might be?”

The two of them stared at each other for a long moment before Jim finally spoke again.

“Because, I really think you should,” he said softly, before turning away, suddenly needing Leonards’ solidarity and comfort. The reassurance that he wasn’t alone and neither was Leonard.

Jim relaxed as soon as he could be with Leonard again, pulling him slightly aside after first making sure neither of them were needed. He hesitated not a wit to show Leonard affection,  _ needing  _ to do it just to feel balanced again. Leonard, for his part, allowed Jim to do so, and Jim knew he’d needed it too.

After a bit, a sound made Jim turn and smirk as he watched the other Jim, Spock and McCoy. The other Jim couldn’t take his eyes off McCoy, a troubled and thoughtful expression on his face. He’d almost reached out to him several times and pulled back each time, biting at his lip.

It was strange to see such uncertainty on his own face but then, it wasn’t  _ quite _ his own face, was it?

“Jim, what did you do?” Leonard asked suspiciously, following his gaze towards their counterparts.

“Nothing. Just gave them all a push in the right direction.”

“I want my counterpart to be as happy as I am, sure, but I don’t think wrecking what the other Jim has with his Spock is the way to go about it,” Bones said slowly.

Jim turned to look at Leonard. “Somehow… I don’t think that’s how it’s gonna work out.”

“You tellin’ me you’re harboring feelings for  _ our  _ Spock?” Leonard asked dryly.

“I’m telling you that that they – “ Jim pointed – “ _ do _ . I could never imagine myself with Spock, and he’s well matched with Lieutenant Uhura. Look, you saw it yourself - we’re not all the same. We’ve got different histories – both in general and during our own specific formative years. Our experiences and memories, they make us who we are and we haven’t had the same ones. It makes a difference, Bones.”

He glanced around almost furtively, but Spock and Spock were standing together, their heads buried in data from the tricorders as they monitored the last few moments before the next spike. Jim lowered his voice anyway.

“Here, I’ve got you and that’s all I need. Spock is a friend. And a damn good one, and the closest I’ve had ever save you. But there? There, that Jim needs both of them, whatever the reason, and whether they are all aware of it or not, the three of them love each other. How it happened? Who knows,” Jim shrugged. “But I couldn’t see that love triangle and not  _ try  _ to help.”

Jim leaned in towards Leonard. “And I do hate seein’ you sad, Bones, no matter which universe. You were pining… like a puppy dog. I had to put you out of your misery.” He kissed Leonard softly, but his grip on his arm was tight. “I just hope it helps.”

Leonard wrapped his arms around Jim. “I don’t think much of your meddling – “

Jim snorted. “Says the ships meddler – “

“Shut up, kid. As I was sayin’, I don’t think much of your meddling but I hope it works out. It’s too bad we’ll never know.”

Both Spocks raised their heads at that moment, speaking in unison,

“It’s time.”


	9. Now What?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim has given Kirk a lot to think about, and he does while they wait for their window of opportunity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> almost done! last chapter goes up tomorrow!

OS KIRK

Kirk watched the other Jim walk away and join the other Bones, the words Jim had spoken whirling about in his mind. Watching Jim and Bones interact was… was actually painful, more painful than he’d expected. The love between them was palpable, easily seen in each small touch and quirked grin, in the other Jim’s teasing and the other Leonard’s sarcastic yet gentle responses.

Jim leaned into Leonard with a touch and Leonard accepted the touch with a grumpy smile and sparkling eyes and Kirk’s breath caught.

It was nearly heartbreaking as Kirk finally saw from the outside how he and his Bones acted around each other – he’d always known that was how they were – but to see it, to see the way it appeared to others, was like a veil lifting from his eyes.

But he was with Spock and he loved Spock dearly. He couldn’t leave him, it would tear Kirk apart. But realizing, finally, how he felt for Leonard…

Kirk feared  _ that  _ might tear him apart too.

Without realizing it, the group he’d been staring at, the two away parties that  _ had  _ been working together, had broken apart, and Kirk was startled when he realized he was no longer standing alone where Jim had left him.

“Jim?” Spock –  _ his  _ Spock, his T’h’yla – spoke from beside him, breaking into his thoughts. Concern tinged over the bond though there was none showing on his face. “You are… unsettled. Is there something I can help you with?” He paused. “Of course, if you’re worried about us getting home – “

“No,” Jim said quickly, holding up a hand to interrupt Spock. “No, we’ve got the best minds in two dimensions working on this. I know we’ll get home.”

“Your confidence is well placed,” Spock said.

Bones –  _ his  _ bones, his lonely best friend and oh how that thought hurt, that Bones would never have anybody because Kirk was already taken – stepped over to them. “Always so humble, aren’t ya, Spock?”

Spock inclined his head and raised a brow in preparation of the mild banter he and Bones often partook in.

Normally, Kirk would sit back and watch the show, enjoy the sight of his two favorite people in the entire universe interacting with other.

Normally, he hadn’t just had a cold and very painful revelation.

Now, now he was watching every action, listening to every word and putting it under a microscope. Watched each twitch of Bones’ hands, noting, finally, the aborted and guarded movements.

Guarded… around Kirk and Spock.

Like the man had feelings he was hiding away beneath that sarcastic, yet somehow still good-natured, exterior.  

With every new piece of information he took in, Kirk’s heart broke further. How had he not noticed? How could he have done this to Bones without even a care in the world? McCoy was  _ hurting _ , Kirk could see it in his eyes and he’d never realized.

He had to fix this, but  _ how? _

What was there for him to even do that wouldn’t just push his best friend away? Was he selfish in wanting to keep McCoy ever by his side? By his and Spocks? If Kirk let on to Bones that he knew how he felt, how would that help anything? What did that leave for Kirk to  _ do  _ if he was unwilling to leave Spock?

“I am merely confirming for the captain that past evidence – both in our universe  _ and _ theirs - bears out the simple fact that, when dealing with the unknown or with impossible odds or both, as long as the three of us are together, our chances of success escalate,” Spock pointed out evenly. “I  _ could  _ run the numbers for you, if it makes you feel better.”

It wasn’t a question, but an offer of comfort, Kirk realized.

Soothing came through the bond and something else, something that had gone along for the ride but Kirk couldn’t catch. It disappeared too fast as Spock reeled it back in, obviously unwilling to show whatever it was that had been – at least not yet, from the apologetic air that slipped in afterwards.

“Nah, I trust ya, Spock. ‘Sides, I’m an old, country doctor. All that technical babble will go right over my head,” Bones said with a roll of his eyes and a smirk twitching at his lips.

They’d bantered back and forth since day one, so it wasn’t any sort of surprise, but the surprise to Kirk was that the banter had changed. It had gone from pointed ribbing to grudging acceptance of the other to actual fondness.

Or maybe something more.

That was it, Jim realized, his eyes going wide. Maybe that was the solution all along.

Of course, it might be too soon to congratulate himself. He still needed to confirm a few things first, and he would need to talk to Spock. Even if he wanted to hide it, there was no way he’d be able to. Even without the bond, Spock knew him too well and would suss it out eventually.

And whenever Jim wasn’t feeling right, Bones was always there to help. Between the two of them, they’d get it out of him anyway. There was no chance of hiding this. Delaying it, maybe, but hiding it?

Never.

He just had to figure out the best way to bring it up.

Yeah, that’d go well. Hey, Bones, are you in love with me?  Leonard would clam up even if the answer was yes, too gentlemanly to intrude where he believed he wasn’t wanted.

All too soon – or not soon enough – the time came.

The away teams arranged themselves into the proper groups, their equipment at their feet. Both Spocks’ were counting down the seconds and Kirk saw Jim and Leonard grab each other’s hands.

Wind whipped up, like it had the first time they’d beamed off this planet, brought in by the strange, radiation clouds that had formed over them.

Or rather, the wind had brought the strange clouds to them, just as they had last time.

Kirk raised his hand to the other team as both Spocks counted aloud simultaneously, closing in on one rapidly.

Jim cupped his free hand around his mouth and shouted through the wind, “You think about what I said!”

Nodding, Kirk ignored the perplexed look from McCoy as Spock hit one and the familiar hum and sparkle of the transporter surrounded him.

As soon as they rematerialized, McCoy stepped down from the pad as if he’d been burnt by it, then swung around and pointed at Kirk, Spock and Heinz.

“The three of you are coming with me to sickbay,  _ no  _ arguments!” he growled. “There was too much talk of radiation for my peace of mind.”

“Relax, Bones, it was harmless,” Kirk assured him.

“We don’t actually know that,” McCoy said. “Sickbay. Now.”


	10. Epilogue - Back to square one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They've made it back to their own universes, but the question now is, can things between the three of them stay the same? And should they?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> READ THIS FIRST
> 
> so for this last chapter, it's ONLY the original series crew - which I've been referring to by their last names throughout the series so you can tell which crew is which, right? 
> 
> but for the last scene, i wanted it to be more personal, if that makes sense, so they're using their first names. but it's just the original series crew

**OS BONES**

Leonard McCoy sat alone in his quarters, a glass of bourbon in his hand.

The past 2 days had been painful, to say the least. To see that there was a universe out there where his feelings were reciprocated had been both gratifying and… and depressing.

Because it would never happen here. Here, he was alone, watching his two best friends be together without him. It had been difficult enough before, before he could see how  _ right  _ he and Jim could be together.

Now, all he wanted to do was drown his sorrows and take a breather from all things Jim and Spock.

Which was, of course, when his door chime went off. He groaned, pillowing his face in his hands. It could only be them. Time to put his game face on. He gulped the rest of his bourbon – not much left – wiped his face clean of all resentment, jealousy and hopelessness, putting on the tired, jovial mix the other two had come to expect of him.

Spock wasn’t the only one who hid his emotions, Leonard just went about a different way of doing it.

The door chimed again, almost impatiently. Either he’d taken too long to compose himself, or something was bothering them too.

He stood, calling out ‘come’, watching the door slide open as he grabbed up a second glass.

“Drink?” he asked, holding up the bottle of bourbon as both Jim  _ and  _ Spock walked in.

“Sure,” Jim said, his hands clasped behind his back, a nervous smile on his face. Leonard squinted at him. Why was  _ he  _ nervous?

“No thank you, doctor,” Spock declined politely. Always declining but Leonard couldn’t help but offer.

“Suit yourself, Spock,” Leonard said. He poured a generous helping into both glasses, and Jim didn’t mention the fact that it was obvious Leonard had already been drinking which he was counting as a win. He handed Jim his glass, took his own and sat back down on his chair, leaving Jim and Spock the small couch.

They sat on it together, cozy as could be. Leonard’s stomach always twisted a little when he saw them together like that, but today was a maelstrom. He sipped at his bourbon in the suddenly awkward silence, waiting for them to cut to the chase.

Jim was definitely anxious about something, Spock looking at him in concern, briefly touching Jim’s thigh with encouragement. Leonard almost snorted.  _ No emotions, my ass. _

“Okay, there’s no easy way to ask this, and subtlety will leave too much room for misinterpretation, so I’m gonna come right out and ask. Bones, are you in love with me?” Jim asked abruptly, putting the still full glass down on the table.

Bones choked on his drink, coughing briefly as he set his down as well, glaring up at Jim.

“Is this your idea of a joke?” Leonard demanded.

“I fail to see any humor in the question,” Spock said bluntly.

“Guys, guys, guys,” Jim said, his hands up placatingly. He turned to Bones and spoke gently. “It’s not a joke, Bones.”

Bones snorted and crossed his arms over his chest. “The hell it is.”

“It’s a yes or no question,” Jim said.

“It ain’t that simple,” Leonard said quietly, his eyes flicking over to Spock and back. “Look, whatever I do or do not feel for you, you don’t have to worry about things being awkward, or it interfering in my job, or me getting between the two of you, all right?”

“So you  _ do  _ have feelings for me?” Jim asked.

Leonard stood up angrily. “What does it matter? Why are you pushing this? Don’t you realize it hurts enough as it does? That I wished to spare you any guilt or, or  _ pity  _ you might have for my ill judgment for falling in love with someone who can’t reciprocate.”

“Someone, or someones?” Jim asked.

Leonard froze midstep.

“What?” he croaked. Whirling to face them, Leonard stared at Jim and Spock in horror and dawning realization.

He’d been jealous, he’d been so damn jealous. But Jim was right. It wasn’t so much that he was jealous that Jim had Spock, it was that they had each other and he was left, the odd man out. The feelings he had for Spock weren’t as, as  _ strong  _ as he had for Jim, perhaps, but given time they could be.

“My God,” he managed, covering his face and stumbling back till he could fall into his chair. “I’m such a goddamned fool.”

“No, you’re not, Bones,” Jim said softly, his voice close – too close. Hands closed over Leonard’s and gently pulled them away from his face. Jim was kneeling before him, an expression of wary hope on his face. Spock hovered close by, quiet support as Leonard’s wet eyes flicked between them both.

“How am I not?” he said, his voice rough.

“Because if you are, then so am I,” Jim said.

“Well, you usually are,” Leonard said on automatic. The hint of his usual banter caused Jim to snort and almost fold over, his head resting on their still clasped hands briefly before he raised it again.

“Look, I was blind and I hurt you without ever meaning to, but I’ve had my eyes opened and Spock and I have talked about it and we think we can still salvage this, if you’re willing,” Jim said.

“Talk plainly, Jim. What are you getting at?”

“What if it isn’t just Spock and I? What if it was Spock, me and  _ you, _ all of us together? If there’s feeling on all sides – and it seems to me there is – than I think this is the answer, if you’re willing to give us a try?” Leonard stared into Jim’s eyes and the longer he stared the more he realized that behind the confidence and hope was fear. Fear of what? That Leonard would turn him down? That this wouldn’t work out if they tried?

Swallowing, Leonard looked up at Spock, trying to get a read on the Vulcan. Sometimes he could and sometimes he couldn’t. Spock confounded him in that way, but he’d noted, once, that he seemed more capable of that then most others except Jim.

Spock slowly lowered himself into a crouch beside Jim and Leonard, Leonard’s head following him down with a held breath. He forced it out again to speak.

“And you’re okay with this?” he asked, incredulously. “With me horning in on you and Jim?”

“I find that I am,” Spock said. “I had noted to the captain earlier today that the three of us are better together then apart. I have a deep regard for you, Leonard, perhaps deeper than you realize. I have always known that Jim also cared for you in a manner that was much more than mere friendship, though he had not realized it yet. This was always a possibility. What I was unsure of, was your feelings towards me.”

Leonard looked over at Jim, back at Spock and back at Jim and barked out a short laugh. “Well, don’t that beat all.” He shook his head. “All this time, right in front of our damn noses.”

Jim let go of one of his hands and cupped it around Leonard’s face instead. “We can make up for all that lost time, if you want to?”

Shooting him a shaky smile, Leonard said, “What are you waiting for, then, darlin’?”

* * *

 

**Bonus Scene**

Kirk leaned over to Jim

“They wouldn't go for Kirktronium, would they?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i did it! i finally finished this - my longest star trek story ever. it only took over 2-3 years with a long hiatus between. i seriously thought i'd have to abandon this, because nothing was working right but here it is! 
> 
> thank you all for reading!!


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